Courtesy of JC

ORRFA Review - Round 6


Larrikin Lagoon Lefties 1051 def by Marble Bar Misfits 1234

An impressive performance by the orange tsunami ensured a day out for coach Len. The Misfits overcame a pretty shit performance up forward to overwhelm an ordinary ‘Goonies outfit. Five tons to zero in the Misfits favour tells the story, with coach’s love children Ward, Kelly, Whitfield and Williams all raising the bat. As for the Lefties, well, just one of those days I suspect the coach would soon forget. A 49 from the usually unstoppable Goldy says it all really. And who would have thought someone would say that Goldy had his arse handed to him by Andrew Phillips (91)?

Following an evening spent at the Bar’s HQ, combined with the completely shite performance put up by the ‘Goonies this week, conspiracy theories are in full swing as to what dodgy tactics were employed by the folk from the Bar. Misfits by name, as they say….


Venus Bay Vultures 1364 def Gundagai Grasshoppers 985

Splat went the ‘Hoppers as Fitzy’s Vultures continued their bright start to the year and dished out an old fashioned beating to sNoZ’s mob. Parker (151) dominated in the middle and was well supported by Greene and Crisp. Hulk Hogan went into full beast mode up forward as he booted a lazy 7 on his way to 139.

Following the late withdrawal of Cripps, the 3 man Gundagai midfield battled hard for a combined 325 but other than Billings up forward, they got precious little help. And to add further insult, Weitering went down with a shoulder injury - possibly from carrying his fellow defenders, judging by some of their scores.


Iron Knob Codpieces 1205 def Lovely Banks Lilacs 964

Now sitting second on the ladder, Jimbo may be wondering where all the fuss about rucks comes from. While still scoring well below what we’ve come to expect from them, the Codpieces cruised to 5-1 on the back of strong performances from Hanley (128), Shuey and Macrae (both 114). Waite’s fast start to the year continued and Gazza showed us what his version of ‘out of form’ is with a paltry 102.

A tough weekend for the Lilacs as 3 scores under 40 and a no show in the ruck ruined any chance they had of posting a competitive score. Caddy (123) and Duncan were the Lilacs best and Rampe was solid down back. For coach Jen, Parish, Heeney and young Langford continue to show that the good times are coming, even if some patience is required.


Cradle Mountain Devils 1197 def Gariwerd Cockatoos 1119

The Devils squared the ledger at 3-3 after getting up in the closest match of the round. Hickey (112) dominated in the ruck for Gariwerd but they failed to capitalise on it as the midfield battle finished close enough to a draw. Pendles, Grigg and Redden all notched tons for the Devils, as did Steven and Jones for the Cockies.

The Devils got home on the strength of their forwards as Zorko and Stevie J ran riot (110 and 124). The Cockies, on the other hand, got very little from their forwards. Christensen tried hard but the subpar scores from his 3 forward line buddies sealed their fate.

Now sitting at 1-5 after 5 straight losses, the Gariwerd coach has received assurances that he has the full support of the board.


Birdsville Battlers 1267 def by Wagga Wagga Wombats 1359

A welcome return to form for Lenny’s lot as a season high score for the Wombats ensured they got the win over the Battlers. The Battlers’ mids went large, led by Lachie Hunter (154), but it wasn’t enough against as the Wombats sent a reminder that their best is indeed good enough.

While an impressive seven Wombats passed the century, this game was decided in the backline with the Wombats defenders easily outpointing their Birdsville rivals. Thompson’s impressive 125 was overshadowed by Courtney Dempsey (132) who notched his first ton since 2013. (I admit - I looked that shit up because I was thinking “Dempsey hit the ton? When the hell did that last happen?”)


Charlie’s Opening Spelunkers 1220 def by Foul Bay Chickens 1473

With the Chooks now 6-0 and almost a thousand points better than anyone else so far, perhaps el Bandito was right to call for a Royal Commission into Chiefbet’s pre-season odds? Their major sponsorship of the Chooks certainly looks a little suss now.

As for the game itself, CR’s quartet of Cats feasted on some Sun and none more than Flat Track Hawkins (140). Heater and Bartel played kick to kick for a while with Selwood, Danger and Dahlhaus all joining in at different stages. Chip Frawley’s KO was about the only downside for the Chooks.

Bandit’s boys were solid enough with 4 tons of their own but struggled down back as their defenders couldn’t keep pace with the likes of Shaw and Bartel. Acres will be hoping for a promotion after an impressive showing in the reserves.


Wineglass Bay Packers 1048 def by Mount Beauty Uglies 1312

The Uglies continued their recent good form with an easy win over the Packers. Viney, Riewoldt, Dusty and Boyd were the best for Mount Beauty in what was a solid win with very few passengers. Now sitting at 4-2, is this the year the Uglies finally deliver on their potential? The signs look promising so far for Bama’s boys.

Unfortunately for Tracey, the Packers were unable to repeat last week’s heroics. Only Scully and Sloane really put up a fight and one score over 70 from the forwards and defenders combined ensured a tough day at the office. The wine glass may have needed a few refills after that one.


Darraweit Guim Dirrigibles 1144 def by Nunawading Nuffers 1234

In a game where cruel irony was the story of the day, this one was decided in the ruck. By the ruck the losing coach traded to the winning coach. You just couldn’t make this stuff up.

Clearly offended after being told the Mullet was the coach’s preferred ruck before being traded, NicNat (145) dished out some Reservoir Dogs style torture to poor old Ivan (24), who was probably left wondering “Well, I don’t know why I came here tonight….”. Walters and Coniglio tried their best but were unable to overcome Ivan’s arse kicking.

On the other side of the coin, the improving Nuffers have now registered 2 wins and a draw from their last 3 outings. Coach Andy would’ve been delighted that a couple of his beloved Blues, Simpson (100) and Daisy (141), were key figures in the result and Daisy even reminded us there was a time when people thought he could actually play.


Whitsunday Warriors 1172 def by Waikikamoocow Incorrigibles 1338

Having seen their Chelsea appreciation round dropped from the fixture, the Warriors and the Cows battled it out in what is now dubbed ‘the Pinot Cup’. The Cows took eth Cup home on the back of their midfield dominance as Hannebery, Mitchell and Graham all knocked up getting the ball. Mitch Robbo threw his weight around, while Dan Menzel’s 124 was a reward for persistence and hopefully a sign of things to come for the young man.

Perhaps the highlight for the Warriors was a breakout game from young ruck Rory Lobb who posted an impressive 120. While Barlow’s resurgence continued and Motlop and Boak were both good, a 14 and a donut meant it was mission impossible for the Warriors, some of whom were allegedly spotted at the Tiki Bar before the full time siren had gone.