TooSerious

For those who take it way too seriously

Exactly one month now until opening night of the 2021/22 NBA season, and we're back for another season of fantasy NBA here at TooSerious!

Please comment below if you are wanting to play this season.

This will be our 12th season running TS Fantasy NBA leagues!!
Usually we have had four leagues of 12 teams in each, with promotion/relegation each season. However, last season we dropped down to three leagues of 12.
Last season's promotion/relegation results can be found here.

Former champions of the Premier League are:
20/21: @HEAVER
19/20: @Steve *unfinished season
18/19: @bgt2110
17/18: @anthak
16/17: @stowie
15/16: @stowie
14/15: @stowie
13/14: @Mick
12/13: @Ruddy
11/12: @Jasmine
10/11: @dabombers

For those who are new, we use the ESPN platform.
We will run with the same points system, settings and promotion/relegation setup as last season.

Here is a timetable for the next few weeks (subject to change):

Sunday Sept 19th (today): Expressions of interest open;
Sunday Oct 10th: Aim for leagues to be finalised, with all invitations sent;
Sunday Oct 17th: Draft;
Tuesday Oct 19th: Opening night.

Please post in the comments if you are keen to play this season.
If you’re a fan of, say, Port Vale, the team that finds itself in the fourth tier of the English soccer pyramid system, well, you’ve probably come to terms with the fact that you’re never going to see your beloved Valiants win the Premier League. Whilst those fans may never say that out loud and even if hope does spring eternal, there will be an unspoken agreement that this is the case.



Of course, that won’t stop them from showing up in their droves and cheering their team on every week, and in reality, not fighting for the Premier League title is not a deal-breaker for these fans, or in fact, any other supporters scattered throughout the length and breadth of the land who find themselves in a similar predicament. But should they have to live their lives accepting that they will never climb to the top of the summit of English soccer? Could something be done to even the playing fields?

If you’re reading this and currently shaking your head as you dismiss the idea of professional sport ever being a level playing field then consider for a second how competitive the AFL in Australia is. Indeed, some 9442 miles away from Stoke-on-Trent where Port Vale play their soccer, lies Australia and the famous Aussie Rules.

The best way of describing the AFL is a throwback to a time when sport was played for the love of it. That’s not to say that the players don’t get remunerated exceptionally well, but because of the AFL’s salary cap, the wages on offer keep the players honest.

In fact, in 2020, the average annual salary for a listed player was $259,651. Sure, it’s a handsome wage and it’s worth noting that the AFL’s rich list will show some of the biggest earners receiving closer to a million dollars a season, but crucially, it’s not enough to disrupt the competition in the league.

In stark contrast to that,...
The big dance

Foul Bay Chickens 1224 defeated Lovely Banks Lilacs 990
The Chief might be hobbled, but he isn’t done yet… grinding out a win against the Lilacs. Dangers injury takes another one down which leaves him with a soft underbelly, and the gallant efforts of two meter Peter (149) weren’t enough for @Jen ’s mob.

Venus Bay Vultures 1355 defeated Gariwerd Cockatoos 1335
This was a close one, with both coaches watching on intently. @Fitzy even prayed to the gods which resulted in a delay to the final game, and his rousing speech in the change room caused the turnaround in Gaff and Yeo required to get the Vultures over the line against the unlucky Cockies. Fiorini good for the victors, and Buddy a stinker… but we all want him to get to the 1000. Miller and ANB went large for @anthak ‘s men,

Gundagai Grasshoppers 1302 defeated marble Bar Misfits 1213
Boy oh boy wowee what a game… both teams down on their best, and @snoz ‘s men did enough even though they only recorded three tons to @Len ‘s four. Wil Powell went nuts

Cradle Mountain Devils 1581 defeated Mount Beauty Uglies 1296
Probably easier to call out who didn’t perform for @dmandrews squad… 1581 is right up there in terms of the biggest scores in ORFFA history. 11 scores over 90, 7 of them over 120. It wouldn’t have matted if @HeavyMen put the boots on, the Devils are the form team in the finals race, and everyone is shit scared of them… No Pendles, no worries

The Zac

Charlie’s Opening Spelunkers 1244 defeated Nareewillock Nuffers 972
My mob just quietly going about their business… my forward line still sucks. @chris88 ‘s team will be back bigger and better next year.

Wagga Wagga Wombats 1098 defeated Larrikin Lagoon Lefties 1026...
Waikikamoocow Incorrigibles 1,229 lost to Venus Bay Vultures 1,367

The finals hopes of @graeme's Waikikamoocow Incorrigibles were alive entering the final round however they needed to defeat the Venus Bay Vultures and have some other results go there way. The Cows and Venus Bay each had 10 players score over 70, however the Vultures dominated the century count 8-3 which resulted in @Fitzy ’s Vultures recording a 138 point win.

The Cows three century makers were midfielders Tom Mitchell (132) and Dion Prestia (113) along with ruck Reilly O’Brien (109). Four Cows scored 90’s - a trio of defenders in Bailey Williams (94), Ryan Burton (93) and Jeremy McGovern (91) along with forward Tom Papley (94). The Cows were outplayed on the interchange, losing this two-player line 99-191. The Cows season tally of 21,099 points scored ranked seventh in the ORFFA in 2021 however they didn’t fare as well in head-to- head battles, conceding a league-high 20,648 points and finished 11th on the ladder.

A Vulture on each of the four-player lines registered a score of at least 130, with players in this category being midfielder Jaeger O’Meara (156) who was best afield, forward Bailey Dale (130) and Jack Crisp (143) who was the highest scoring defender in the ORFFA for the round. Eight Venus Bay players reached triple figures with other centurions being defender Jeremey Howe (101) in his first game back from injury, midfielders Luke Parker (111) and Andrew Gaff (100), ruck Oscar McInerney (113) and midfielder Brayden Fiorini (106) from the interchange. Venus Bay ranked sixth for points scored in 2021 with 21,478 points scored and performed superbly in head-to-head battles to record 14 wins, three losses and finished second on the ladder.

Larrikin Lagoon Lefties 927 lost to Mount Beauty Uglies 1,383

The five Lefties in the centre of the field performed well for @That KI Guy, with each player scoring at least 90 points and...
We ORFFANs enjoy a good old-fashioned love in with Clint. So, I though, why, in the depths of winter, why not binge out on Clint Eastwood movies? A feeble attempt to match games to movies our hero either starred in or directed. Some match-ups featured long-standing rivalries, the palimpsests on which ORFFA’s history is written, and some just fitted in with the theme. Then late Sunday rolled around and the Association went into conniptions as Swans and Giants players were withdrawn from named teams because of potential covid worries. As some players went into lockdown (please excuse the editorial exaggeration for impact) our teams were already locked in. But we carried on as the full round of games was played. Luckily, no real hard luck stories emerged.

Gariwerd Cockatoos (1230) v Larrikin Lagoon Lefties (1022)

Rawhide (1959-1965) – long running TV series set in the west pitting good against bad. It was when we first observed Clints habit of speaking through his teeth. The oldest ORFFA squad against the team perpetually looking to return to the glory days – back before some of us were born? I hear you say. Back then Clint played a cowboy named Rowdy Yates. Sadly, no player in this match had either name. However, there were some supporting roles of note. For the home side Touk Miller (120) naturally starred. Predictably there were centuries from Aaron Hall (110) and Cam Guthrie (108) and geriatrics Shannon Hurn (114) and Josh P Kennedy (109). If I sound bored, it also happened last week against my mob. The Lefties were anodyne. When you see the scores of the players who were not middle of the road, daytime TV standard you will understand - Tarryn Thomas (108), James Worpel (100), Jy Simpkin (99), Mitchell Georgiades (95).

Move 'em on, head 'em up
Head 'em up, move 'em on
Move 'em on, head 'em up
Rawhide

Charlies Opening Spelunkers (1241) v Foul Bay Chickens (1267)

The Man with No Name* series (mid 1960s) – the spaghetti...
It’s the stage of the season where most coaches are making their final upgrades.
Some would’ve been able to finish their team a couple of weeks ago, and others might still have a couple of upgrades to go.

Once you’ve made your final upgrade and hence finished your team, post it in here, let us know your cash in hand and how many trades you have for the run home.
Apologies for the delay..

Waikikamoocow 1182 defeated Nareewillock 921

The Cows win as expected, Bailey (124), Mitchell (110) and Newman (106) led the charge, Papley’s 29 the lowlight but not alone in underperforming, Graeme will be looking for the key to firing this lot up for finals.
For the Nuffers Hill appears to have remembered what footy is all about, Keath continues his reliability, Gulden, Dow and Rowell all offering hope whilst CCJ’s 5 is better than some recent ruck scores it lacked magnitude.

Gundagai 1343 defeated Gariwerd 1243
This game was closer than one might have thought a month or so ago, ant has the cockies up and running whilst snoz’s powerhouse is developing cracks of inconsistency.
The Hoppers had 7 century makers led by Grundy (126) and Mills (121) while Bilings Martin and Cripps underwhelmed.
The Cockatoos had 4 raise the bat, Miller’s 153 was the standout amongst a group that mostly played to their level, lack of a playing ruck cost him a realistic chance of a win.

Wineglass Bay 1109 defeated by Lovely Banks 1197
Another good contest, this time between two teams at similar stages of development both packed with draftees who for the most part did their owners proud.
The Packers had Lynch (126) and Dunstan (118) salute while Lukosius, Keays, Hewett and Daicos all excited.
For the Lilacs Parish attempted to win it all on his own with a mammoth 190 making Amon (126) and Stewart (107 look small by comparison.

Marble Bar 1340 defeated Larrikin Lagoon 920
Predictable outcome given where the two teams sit in their build, Marble Bar’s MSD pickup McCarthy led the Misfits with 120.
The Lefties had no 100s, but solid performances across the board from the youth is no doubt encouraging for mollydookers across the nation.

Iron Knob 1017 defeated by Venus Bay 1145
The Cods played with 2 OOP defenders and one short in the mids, Macrae, Darling and de Goey tried hard to get them over the line but too much left to...
A week with some monster scores, high-quality matches, including a couple of close ones, but also plenty of dross. So here is this week’s review, aka ‘The good, the bad and the ugly’.

(Note: some of these are a reach but I had to shoehorn a couple in to fit :))

Gundagai Grasshoppers 1449 def Waikikamoocow Incorrigibles 1178

The Hoppers
The Good: Eight tons and 1449
The Bad: No tons up fwd
The Ugly: Cripps (a stretch when you've posted 1400+)

The Incorrigibles
The Good: Gov, Titch and Howe
The Bad: Fyfe’s withdrawal
The Ugly: Finlayson

Nareewillock Nuffers 924 def by Wineglass Bay Packers 1023

The Nuffers
The Good: Two playing rucks!
The Bad: Only three scores over 80
The Ugly: Samson Ryan’s debut (poor kid)

The Packers
The Good: The midfield
The Bad: Played one short
The Ugly: Five scores under 50

Gariwerd Cockatoos 1308 def Marble Bar Misfits 1256

The Cockies
The Good: Seven tons
The Bad: The ruck
The Ugly: A couple scored 50 or less

The Misfits
The Good: Whitfield
The Bad: The forward line
The Ugly: McCartin’s 29

Lovely Banks Lilacs 994 def Iron Knob Codpieces 930

The Lilacs
The Good: Won despite a bad week
The Bad: Played one short
The Ugly: No healthy ruck

The Cods
The Good: Macrae and Scrimshaw
The Bad: The forward line
The Ugly: Only managed 13 warm bodies

Larrikin Lagoon Lefties 951 def by Whitsunday Warriors 1001

The Lefties
The Good: Simpkin
The Bad: Only fielded 14
The Ugly: The forwards (apart from Marshall)

The Warriors
The Good: The oldies, Boak and Smith
The Bad: The forwards (apart from Dixon)
The Ugly: Six scores under 50

Venus Bay Vultures 1343 def Charlies Opening Spelunkers 1238

The Vultures
The Good: Buddy wound back the clock
The Bad: Mids were down
The Ugly: A couple didn’t get to 50

The Spelunkers
The Good: Bont and Zerrett
The Bad: Forwards were average
The Ugly: A couple didn’t get to 50 (and a...



The Western Bulldogs had the worst defence of the eight teams during the regular season that contested last year’s AFL Finals Series. After 10 games of the current campaign, however, they sit atop of the ladder after snatching the highest rung from Melbourne on points percentage.

It’s clear that the Bulldogs, who lost in the first round of the AFL Finals by three points, have tightened things up. They had the second-best defence in the league going into a top two clash with Melbourne at the Marvel Stadium in Docklands.

That clash could well shape how the rest of the regular AFL season pans out. The pair have a six-point advantage over Brisbane Lions, Geelong and Adelaide Crows going into that game. Strong form for both the Bulldogs and Melbourne, who recently lost their unbeaten record for the campaign, comes in stark contrast to the reigning premiers Richmond.

The Tigers finished last season third on the ladder before bouncing back from a loss to the Brisbane Lions to make and win the AFL Grand Final, beating Geelong to claim the Premiership. However, Richmond have been indifferent with five wins and as many defeats this term, form which isn’t as yet enough to book another berth in the Finals Series.

It’s, therefore, no surprise that Western Bulldogs and Melbourne seemingly have it between them in the Aussie Rules betting on the regular season winner. Going into their match, it’s the Bulldogs who are made the 2.87 favourites to finish top of the ladder.



An outright AFL Grand Final success is a bigger price in a more open betting market, however. Nobody is disposing of the ball in the league more than Jack Macrae right now with the Bulldogs. Not only is he winning...
In the short post ORFFA life of this fantasy coach I have become nostalgic. What greater nostalgia is represented by the 1960’s to 1980’s Friday and Saturday nights in Australia and New Zealand which were often spent visiting Suburban drive-ins which showed a single, double and in some cases triple bill with families of 6 or 7 piling into domestic made vehicles and clipping on their drive-in movie speakers to watch some wholesome and not so wholesome entertainments. Kids were running back and forth to the concession stands while once it got dark the teenagers in other sections mostly necked and became familiar with their sweethearts in their Datsun 180B or other such stylish younger persons vehicles of the time.

So here is an attempted drive in and movie themed review of both the wonderful week and partial season so far in the ORFFA, apologies for any errors or omissions as my movie buffdom is limited at best and used only for poorly presented thematic purposes, and note of course the upcoming State of Origin and MSD period which now take centre stage while the 18 clubs take a brief hiatus.

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Misfits 1425 defeated Hoppers 1209
The match shaped as blockbuster movie with the reigning oscar winners against the powerhouse challengers from marble bar. While the Marvel loving Misfit’s Fans would have been hoping to unwind for a full Avenger’s Trilogy the sole Drive In Offering at Marble Bar is a remake of the 1961 classic Western Movie – The Misfits - Starring Nic Nat (163), and Jake Lloyd (142) from the team of the same name and a cameo from Clayton Oliver (139) from the vanquished premiers, who remain 2nd and amongst the favourites to defend their tile despite the loss to the 3rd ranked side.

Rating - a solid 4.5 stars, a sequel is rumoured to be in the works scheduled for late August

Wombats 993 def by Vultures 1162
This match was poised as another blockbuster with top 4 fortunes in the balance and saw the visitors...