The Spud Round
In honour of the humble potato, or this could mean player as there have many a spud in the players of past and I’m sure in the future.


Wineglass Bay Packers 1149 def Gundagai Grasshoppers 1004


A match for the ages? Nup.

A fitting celebration of our themed round? Probably.

With the Gundagai rollercoaster now into top gear, coach Tracey woulda been sharting in her Chardonnay at the prospect of facing this maniacal Hopper unit. Fears were quickly allayed as snoz rolled into town with enough starch to make the Irish skip a beat.

Cameos across the board for the home side with Wilson, Sloane, Hutchings and Lynch were soured somewhat by the mire of Williams, Hendo and oop ruck Jansen. Visitors in Rocky and Grundy peeled off their opponents with ease but were heavily overshadowed by the putridness of…everyone else. Hats off coaches, a stunning potato au gratin appetizer.



Darraweit Guim Dirigibles 1271 def Charlies Opening Spelunkers 1188


If you’re looking for a lesson in how to turn your fortunes around, look no further than the Guim. In Bolton-esque fashion, the deployment of caretaker coach Christophe Richestein has seen the Blimps take out 3 of their last 4 and give team a sense of collective hope. Acknowledging that this hope stuff can be an insidious disease, The Guim management have been quick to sever any lingering comradery by trading out a bevy of talent. Oh yeah, the game. Despite the Guim form line, this one was harder to pick than BJ’s halftime honker. Late outs to both sides made this one an interesting depth test, with Tucker winning the emergency showdown. However the KO of Spitta and spud showings from Jack and the Frenchman, put the Troggs on the back foot for most of the day. For the home side, a great team effort that would have all players involved very proud, right before half of them catch the last bus to nowhere.



Whitsunday Warriors 1291 def Birdsville Battlers 1154


What is it with this Sam Gibson fella? He’s a bloody enigma! I tell you what, if I was an owner I would have traded him years ago. I don’t reckon my family would tolerate the litany of haphazardly broken furniture and electronic equipment borne out of unspeakable frustration. Fortunately he dwells at the Tiki Bar where patience is so plentiful it’s stored in kegs. Mr Gibson and his Roo affiliate Robbie “Ghost” Tarrant have single-handedly got the Warriors over the line this week. On the other side of the ledger, the Battlers again struggled for consistency with more passengers than a free monorail to a Kate Upton photo shoot. Wells and Mayne held the fort but the Clarke/Big Boy ruck combo won the fancy dress prize for their Mr and Mrs Potato Head garb.



Waikikamoocow Incorrigibles 1277 def Cradle Mountain Devils 1222


A fantastic tussle this one, with very few spuds to speak of. Devils will however be cursing the sickening Redden form and the insignificance of Petrie as Pendles was again left to carry the can. Nothing stellar from the Cows here but plenty of promise on the faith shown at this rebuilding club. Glowing efforts from Menzel, Sinclair and McGovern kept the visitors at arm’s length while Zorko was noticeably oppressed by Leppa’s coaching speculation fallout. Byes couldn’t come quick enough for the Tassie boys as they carefully nurse some bodies into the wee hours of the season.


Nunawading Nuffers 1151 def by Iron Knob Codpieces 1286


Rumours abounded over the last few weeks at an unconfirmed sighting of the rare candy-striped Minson in the Iron Triangle. A wave of excitement swelled through the Knob as “welcome back” banners were stretched through the main street and honorary flute music piped over community radio. Alas it was just some idiot in a Wookie mask trying to make a Youtube nasty. None the less, Jimbo is used to playing ruck roulette, and Darling was the unlucky 5th caller this week. Poppy, Gaz and Gray stepped up when required and diluted any influence from Simpson and Daisy. In a final bitter irony, Nic Nat’s Achilles loss sees Andy employing Jimbo as ruck coach over the byes in an effort to teach the remaining Nuffers how to get a hit out when you’re standing hip-deep in a hole.



Mount Beauty Uglies 1314 def by Larrikin Lagoon Lefties 1405


This is blue moon round right? Sure I read that on the fixture. With no Duryea, Baguley, Fisher and Mitchell the Lefties were rewarded with some left field performances from Taberner, Cutler and Suban to make this look easier than it should have been. Most telling for the home side was the withdrawal of NRoo and the KK-KO! Some highlights for the Mount with Krakwhore’s backend, Gawn’s ruck annihilation and Dusty’s chopstick redemption. Notable for the visitors was the 435 make-shift forward line shooting 100+ over par. Only a minor hiccup for the Uglies who still shape as the best challenger to the Foul Bay Behemoth.


Foul Bay Chickens 1503 def Venus Bay Vultures 1222


Well this is gonna be fun isn’t it? Trying to catch a rampant Chooks outfit with a 120+ (Pts For) average buffer on the rest of the comp. The Vultures have the talent to do it but the engine room needs some spark. Embracing the spudly theme, Eski, Parker and Gaff took the Bill Shorten slow bus (or merrier Short Bus) to the Yorke Peninsula and rocked up lame. The Chooks had their work cut out for them for a good five minutes in this one. Losing Dahl and the Century Fox early mattered little when the guts can churn out 627 thanks in no small part to Danger’s 229! Docherty and Pittard toiled well in defence but were flogging a dead carcass.



Wagga Wagga Wombats 1029 def by Marble Bar Misfits 1209


Wondering if anyone saw this coming? Arguably the upset of the round saw the Bar travel to the Den of Pain and crawl out victors.

After 9 rounds, sitting at 7/2, Lenny woulda been sitting back munging on figjam sangas and enjoying the good life in the top four. Three straight losses later and his mates are now passing him notes, politely inferring that his team is…meh. It’s sort of akin to a 12yr old kid in the 80s thinking they have the best music collection ever only to be embarrassingly told that their taste in music is actually pretty shit and that Howard Jones is so not cool (honestly that was not a flashback, it just sounded like a semi-pertinent analogy). Anyhow in putting their dream into action, the Bar went through nearly all seven stages in this one as they Welcomed the return of Laird, Cheered the rise of Williams, Ushered the debut of Rose, Cringed at Joe’s Mo and Mourned the invisible Ruck. For the home side, barely one player broke par as the thin veneer of success was finally rubbed away.


Gariwerd Cockatoos 1198 def Lovely Banks Lilacs 1048


Well Hi Ho Sports fans.

Welcome to the Jack Steven Show.

Starring..Jack Steven’s Foot

….and Jack Steven’s Fist

….and the Jack Steven Marching Band.

With special guest performance by Tom Hickey and the Ruckbreakers.

The Lilacs woulda fronted up to this one with a glimmer of hope as they looked to allay fears of tanking feeding into Spouse-gate.

Hope was shining like Syd Barrett early on as the Cockies bookends went all floppy. Then the 3:03 express from St Kilda rolled in. Game Over.

Let’s be honest here, the Lilacs are a talented side. It’s just that Jen still hasn’t worked out what they’re talented in.