Wineglass Bay Packers 1132 vs Gariwerd Cockatoos 1141 Oooooo close game! Only 9 points in it! Gary’s weird cockatoos (that’s the name right?) managed to pip the packers with primarily just a midfield. Touk Miller (122 and BOG), Rory Laird (115) and Matt Crouch (112) dominated the scoreline, representing about a like … 30%... of the total cock’s score? Im not good at maths. Sounds about right though. Meanwhile packers played as a team. No clear passengers, no clear champions. Proving again that a “champion team will always lose to 3 champions that hog the ball” Pretty sure that’s how that saying goes? Waikikamoocow Incorrigibles 1140 vs Venus Bay Vultures 1023 With the longest possible name in the too serious franchise, using up all available characters, the incorrigibles showed the vultures they ain’t dead. So just buzz off. And who wouldn’t predict this outcome? With names like Alex Sexton, Jaspa Fletcher and Brad Close who… wait wait… reading the list upside down. Sorry about that, with names like Alex Neal-Bullen and Riley O’Brien … feels like either way I read it, this list is upside down. Honestly incorrigibles I can’t tell who you’ve got in your team that’s good. I don’t understand this result. Vultures try harder. * Alex Neal-Bullen was actually pretty good. BOG with 116. Nareewillock Nuffers 1371 vs Wagga Wagga Wombats 869 Nuffers absolutely dominated this game and made the wombats cry. Wombats, who didn’t make it to 4 figures, ultimately just fluffed around and were as relevant in this game as a witches hat is to a Grade 1 Auskick kid (if you’re unsure of this analogy, go check out your local Auskick kids, I assure you witches hats aren’t very important to them). Wombats had three players with no score. Nuffers had all their players turn up which helps. BOG Ed Richards with 163. Mount Beauty Uglies 1332 vs Marble Bar Misfits 1300 Traditional rivals MBU vs MBM and what it game it was! With Misfits having 4 players over 100 including a whopping 153 from BOG Trelor, I’m sure they were feeling pretty cocky about it, before realising that feeling should be reserved for the cockatoos or the codpieces. The uglies had 5 players score over 110 (Butters, Walsh, Petracca, Viney and Gawn) to bring home the MB cup and remain a clear leader in this rivalry. From my count, MBU =2 wins and MBM = 0. Yeah I know. I haven’t been keeping track of this rivalry long. Gundagai Grasshoppers 1407 vs Lovely Banks Lilacs 1307 WHAT A GAME!!!! 100 points the difference exactly! All the maths nerds were just loving it. I know I know, there was some great players, Jordan Dawson gave the grasshoppers a nice 147 and for Lilacs BOG goes to Ollie Wines 157. But more important, all the maths just works nicely. 100 points win exactly. 10 points difference exactly, between their highest scoring players. Wow… just wow. Nice work. Oh and the game was good too I suppose Larrikin Lagoon Lefties 1032 vs Cradle Mountain Devils 1426 Rowan Marshall 164. That’s pretty much all I can say about this game. Sure… there were other players around and everything, but Rowan pretty much single handedly won devils this game. Sneaky little devils. Oh wait, no Pendles scored 147, Naughton 127 and Zorko 117. Actually that’s quite a lot of good players. The lefties had two players score more than a hundred (Riley Bonner 108 and Willie Rioli 102). Which is kinda funny I guess, but is it typical “larrikin” funny? I’m not sure. Birdsville Battlers 1086 vs Charlies Opening Spelunkers 1514 Nearly at the end of this report people, hang in there. If you’ve read this far down you’re the coach of one of these teams, or maybe need to probably re-evaluate your life because it seems you me you’ve got way to much free time. Anyways, Spelunkers gave the Battlers a spelanking. Yep, have used that one before, sorry about that, its hard to come up with new material when you’ve been working on this report for a week and then realise you’re already two weeks behind the week in which you were meant to submit it. Spelunkers had 9 player score more than 100 with Daicos BOG at 147 and the biggest score of the round. Looking that premiership cup right in the eyes. If it had eyes. Probably looking at its own eyes via the reflection of the cup. You know what I mean though, looking at it really intently. Battles did have Luke Ryan, but he only scored a measly 111. We know you can score 200 Luke. Just do that every game. Iron Knob Codpieces 1030 vs Dunsborough Dung Beetles 1177 Okay so the coach of codpieces I’ve been following for a while now. I’ve been watching him and evaluating whether or not he knows how to coach, or if he’s showing promise. I can say this honestly about his ability, sack him, sack him now. He fielded Zac Williams, Jordan De Goey and Mabior Chol who’s combined score was 0. Yep. No jokes. He still doesn’t know what he’s doing after playing this now for 2 years. No player scored more than a 100. Walk in the park for Dung. Mac Andrew racked up 119 for BOG, dung beetles clocked the win, went home and admired how much poop they collected. They were happy. Very happy.
Fantastic piece @churchboy - must admit I didn't understand it all, but really enjoyed it. Must have too much time on my hands.
Marble Bar's manifest supporter groups are pushing for an AGM to address the team's inability to win close games. *sigh* Nice work mate
Love this! Hopefully you get the hang of this comp one day @churchboy , and then the ORFFA better watch out!