For those who take it way too seriously


Friday May 25 at Etihad Stadium (7:50pm)


IN: Reid, Daicos, Greenwood
OUT: Fasolo, Murray, Wells


IN: Schache, Dickson, R.Smith
OUT: Wallis, Dunkley, Webb


Saturday May 26 at the MCG (1:45pm)


IN: Higgins, Moore, Menadue
OUT: Townsend, Castagna, Lloyd


IN: Austin, Carlisle, White, McCartin, McKenzie
OUT: Brown, Marshall, Weller, Armitage, Coffield


Saturday May 26 at the Gabba (4:35pm)




IN: Marsh, Stoddart
OUT: Mills, Rohan


Saturday May 26 at GMHBA Stadium (7:20pm)


IN: Ratguolea, Stanley, Jones, Parfitt
OUT: Horlin-Smith, Parsons, Smith, Thurlow


IN: Weitering, Cuningham, E.Curnow, C.Curnow
OUT: Mullett, Murphy, Graham, Garlett


Saturday May 26 at Spotless Stadium (7:20pm)


IN: Kelly, Patton, Buntine
OUT: Finlayson, Keeffe, Cumming


IN: McGrath
OUT: Clarke


Sunday May 27 at Etihad Stadium (1:10pm)


I/C (from): Mirra, Cousins, Henderson, Burton, Schoenmakers, Ceglar, Glass, Langford

IN: Frawley, O’Meara, Glass, Ceglar, Langford, Schoenmakers
OUT: Brand, Worpel


I/C (from): Brander, Cole, Nelson, Ainsworth, Waterman, Hutchings, Ah Chee, Allen

IN: Brander, Nelson, Ainsworth, Allen
OUT: Nil


Sunday May 27 at TIO Traeger Park (3:20pm)


I/C (from): Harmes, Spargo, Tyson, Hannan, Garlett, Pedersen, Hunt, Fritsch

IN: Tyson, Hunt, Pedersen, Garlett
OUT: Nil


I/C (from): Gallucci, Poholke, Hartigan, Gibson, Murphy, Otten, Milera, O’Brien

IN: Brown, M.Crouch, Milera, O’Brien
OUT: Nil


Sunday May 27 at Optus Stadium (4:40pm)


I/C (from): D.Pearce, Kersten, Sheridan, Nyhuis, Tucker, Giro, Matera, Cerra

IN: Hill, D.Pearce, Kersten, Sheridan, Giro
OUT: Crowden


I/C (from): Garner, Hrovat, Davies-Uniacke, Clarke, Zurhaar, Atley, Wright, Durdin

IN: Garner, Hrovat, Davies-Uniacke, Durdin, Zurhaar
OUT: Daw
The Round 9 That Was…….

Strange weekend. Either your boys came good and you went big or there were a few misfires and you fell well off the pace. Here’s how it turned out.

Wombats 1226 def by Codpieces 1390. Vintage Melksham 160, assisted by Sheil with 107. Hurt by sub-par performances from Sicily, Oliver, Gibbs and Swallow. Meanwhile, the team with Jackson Macrae (177) just sits there and counts the money. A poor 55 from GAJ? Who cares. Harbrow turned back the clock (a long way) with 126. But it was the most potent forward line in the ORFFA that cut loose, led by Darling (181), Riewoldt (114), de Goey (111) and Waite (129). Scary stuff.

Misfits 1226 def Lilacs 1111. Misfits made a welcome return to the winner’s circle, despite a Giant’s team still in the doldrums. Tons to Laird, Webster, Fantasia, Haynes and a massive 173 to Jake Lloyd. The Lilacs continue to keep their heads above the 1,000 mark (a good sign) and were helped with tons from Rampe, Duncan and Heeney.

Uglies 908 def by Devils 1304. The Uglies decided to go for all-out attack by fielding only one defender. A failed strategy, despite 103 from Dusty and 121 from Max. The Devils were simply solid without much fanfare. 104 from Lever, 113 from Heppell, 121 from Zork and 108 from Redden. Uglies looking to dig deep in the MSD.

Warriors 1164 def by Battlers 1203. It was a good week all round for the Battlers. After Brisbane got up they drank the Tiki Bar dry and headed back up the Birdsville track with a win under their belt and getting all feely – touchy with the top 4. It was basically Witts effort in Shanghai (129) that made the difference. Despite an offer to trade Ainsworth, @JC would not leave him off the plane. He was helped by McDonald (115), Ryan (121) and Cutler (113). Otherwise JC would have been a bit disappointed by the flatulent effort from his mids. The Warriors provided a bit of a tussle with 115 from Andrews, 105 from Wines, 125...
Like the Bombers, it's been a rough year for my team this year. Also though, like the Bombers, we got ourselves a much needed win this weekend!!

Unlike the Bombers however, we were helped by an un-observant opposition who left a Macrae 177 VC as their VC. mwhahahaha. :D

How have you all gone?
Following nominations we have 54 teams entered into TS ORFF* Knockout Competitions this year. The 2018 format will be quite different this year so hopefully this can explain it fairly simply.

13 teams have qualified for the 2018 ORFF* Champions League between Rounds 7 and 11 (no play in Round 10). 2 further teams have secured a half qualifying spot for the Champions League and will clash in a winner takes all Round 6 Champions League Playoff contest and then enter the Champions League in the Round of 16 in Round 7.

39 other teams will be competing in the 2018 ORFF* Knockout between Rounds 2 and 7, 25 of these teams will have a bye in Round 2 and enter the completion in Round 3 while 14 teams will battle it out in Round 2.

As well as securing the 2018 Knockout title the winning Knockout Grand Finalist will secure an additional Champions League spot and will enter that competition in the Quarter Finals the next week – ie Round 8.

2018 Champions League allocations occurred as follows
- 12 spots based on 2017 League placings - 3 spots to each competition including Premiers and next 2 highest ranked other sides based on 2017 Home and Away ladder position (excluding teams who did not nominate) - ie Sarah Island, Mallacoota, Tarwin Lower, Waikiks, Venus Bay, Marble Bar, Serengeti, Southern Cross, Nuytsland, Mt Thirsty, Drouin, Jan Juc
- 1 spot to the 2017 ORFF* Knockout winners – with Nuytsland winning the 13th direct spot nominally goes to the Vikings and as they had already qualified then Groote Eyland were added as the next highest nominated ORFFU side after home and away
- 1 spot to the 2018 ORFF* Knockout winners (entering at the Quarter Final stage)
- 2 half spots to the 2017 ORFF* Knockout Runners up and 3rd place teams – Rutherglen and Jan Juc. As Jan Juc had already qualified then Neptune Island were added as the next highest nominated ORFFF side after home and away. As above Rutherglen will host...
Friday, May 18

Adelaide v Western Bulldogs at Adelaide Oval, 7.20pm ACST

In: K.Hartigan, S.Gibson, D.Fogarty, L.Murphy
Out: L.Brown (general soreness), M.Crouch (general soreness), M.McGovern (ankle), T.Walker (glute)
New: Sam Gibson (North Melbourne)

In: J.Trengove, E.Wood, J.Roughead
Out: A.Naughton (ankle), L.Young, M.Honeychurch
Saturday, May 19

North Melbourne v Greater Western Sydney at Blundstone Arena, 1.45pm AEST


In: T.Mohr, H.Perryman
Out: P.Davis (concussion), Boer (hamstring)

Gold Coast v Port Adelaide at Adelaide Arena at Jiangwan Stadium (Shanghai), 3.15pm AEST

In: J.Heron
Out: S.Day (suspended)
New: Jacob Heron (Suns Academy)


Essendon v Geelong at the MCG, 4.35 pm AEST

In: J.Ridley, M.Guelfi, D.Clarke, K.Langford, M.Dea
Out: M.Hurley (hamstring), K.Mutch (rested), D.Myers (injured), D.Parish, B.McNiece
New: Jordan Ridley (Oakleigh U18), Dylan Clarke (Eastern U18)

In: T.Hawkins
Out: E.Ratugolea (injured)

Sydney v Fremantle at the SCG, 7.35pm AEST

In: L.Franklin, D.Hannebery
Out: D.Robinson, D.Towers

In: N.Wilson, M.Walters
Out: T.Duman, D.Pearce

St Kilda v Collingwood at Etihad Stadium, 7.25pm AEST

In: B.Rice, J.Sinclair, J.Lonie
Out: J.Carlisle (concussion), B.Acres (groin), S.Gilbert (thumb)
New: Bailey Rice (Dandenong U18)

In: A.Fasolo, T.Langdon, S.Pendlebury
Out: D.Moore (hamstring), C.Brown, B.Crocker
Sunday, May 20

Carlton v Melbourne at the MCG, 1.10pm AEST

In: M.Murphy, P.Kerr, J.Weitering, J.Silvagni, M.Shaw
Out: E.Curnow (suspended)
New: Pat Kerr (Oakleigh U18), Matt Shaw (Gold Coast)

In: J.Viney, C.Pedersen, J.Hunt, J.Garlett, T.Smith
Out: S.Weideman (injured)

Brisbane v Hawthorn at The Gabba, 3.20pm AEST

In: B.Keays, J.Walker, S.Mayes, J.Barrett
Out: -

In: M.Lewis, J.Cousins, D.Mirra, P.Puopolo,...
Brought to you by the ever-rockin @graeme

ORFFA Round eight –
Rucking hell; farewell to andy, welcome to TTH

Andy is the only ORFFAN I have met; a fun guy for sure. Sometimes we have to be strong and say “right now the real world is more important than the fantasy world.” I hope we all would have the strength to do that. Mate, I am sure you know you are always welcome to drop into ORFFA or Auckland. Stay good andy, hope to see your smiling face soon.

TTH, what a guy – thanks for being willing to step in and help out. For that alone we already recognise you as an ORFFAN. Nice welcome to from the FIXtures committee: “why don’t you play the top of the table Vultures just to get an idea of how easy it will be to climb out of the cellar.” Still there are some tasty draft picks in the MSD to boost the squad and, of course, the internal debate as to whether to rename the team. Hobart Hopefuls? Launceston Losers? Tasmanian Transitions? I am confident you’ll work it out TTH.

I like a theme to run through these missives. This week, every team has to field one. But not every team fields one and yet some teams field more than one. The consternation in our banter threads is one of the constants of ORFFA life. What am I talking about? It should be obvious - rucking hell. Jeez, some of them went big this week. Had some fun with Utube while putting this together, gosh there was some gret music “when I was young” – Eric Burdon and the Animals.

Missings (1220) v Wombats (1261)

The commish was a few short of a team but at least he had a ruck. Ryder (108) comfortably accounted for Lycett (86). However, the west coaster has played all eight games to date while Paddy has only made three appearances so far in 2018. He also has the curse of Gil’s Chinese experiment against him. So, if you cannot separate them on average (Ryder 80.7, Lycett 81.1) would you rather have Ryder’s total score of 242 or Lycett’s total of...
My teams worst ever non bye round.

I copped the Nic Nat donut like many others but could not break the 1800 mark.

5 tons and 9 under 75, disgraceful.

Hopefully your SC side managed far better this week, let us know all about it below.
Mother Day Round watch out for 2 twilight Saturday matches and only the 2 on Sunday, it has caught me and others out in previous years


Friday May 11 at the MCG (7.50pm)

B: Impey, Burton, Frawley
HB: Duryea, Sicily, Hardwick
C: Smith, Shiels, Langford
HF: Mitchell, O’Brien, Gunston
F: Henderson, Roughead, O’Meara
FOLL: McEvoy, Breust, Burgoyne
I/C: Stratton, Howe, Morrison, Whitecross
EMG: Schoenmakers, Brand, Worpel, Cousins

IN: Langford, Henderson
OUT: Cousins, Worpel

B: Smith, Grundy, Lloyd
HB: Mills, Rampe, McVeigh
C: Cunningham, Kennedy, Heeney
HF: Hewett, Towers, Florent
F: Hayward, Rohan, Papley
FOLL: Sinclair, Parker, Jack
I/C: Ronke, Jones, McCartin, Robinson
EMG: Aliir, Cameron, Fox, Newman

IN: McCartin, Robinson
OUT: Fox, Marsh

Saturday May 12 at Spotless Stadium (1.45pm)

B: Haynes, Davis, Shaw
HB: Corr, Finlayson, Whitfield
C: Reid, Coniglio, Taranto
HF: Lloyd, Himmelberg, Shiel
F: Keeffe, Cameron, de Boer
FOLL: Lobb, Hopper, Ward
I/C: Griffen, Langdon, Cumming, Tomlinson
EMG: Simpson, Perryman, Mohr, Buckley

IN: Cameron, Lobb, Cumming
OUT: Buckley, Patton, Shipley

B: Hurn, Barrass, Sheppard
HB: Cole, Schofield, Nelson
C: Duggan, Redden, Masten
HF: Cripps, Darling, Rioli
F: Waterman, Kennedy, LeCras
FOLL: Lycett, Yeo, Gaff
I/C: Ah Chee, McInnes, Hutchings, Ainsworth
EMG: Watson, Rotham, Bayok, Allen

IN: Ah Chee, McInnes, Ainsworth, Schofield
OUT: Naitanui, Shuey, Petrucelle, McGovern

Saturday May 12 at the MCG (2.10pm)

B: Plowman, Rowe, Thomas
HB: Mullett, Jones, Simpson
C: Lang, Cripps, E.Curnow
HF: Fisher, McKay, Graham
F: Petrevski-Seton, C.Curnow, Garlett
FOLL: Kreuzer, Dow, Kerridge
I/C: O’Shea, Lamb, Wright, O’Brien
EMG: Polson, Phillips, Shaw, Silvagni

IN: Lang, C.Curnow, Lamb
OUT: Phillips, Casboult, Kennedy

B: Baguley, Hurley, Saad...
Upgrade season is well under way so lets jump into it. This week I think we should all be focusing on the usual one up/one down trading strategy but remember to consider your list situation.

Before you begin, a plug for @The_Swert post on fallen premiums. Well researched and worth a read as you consider who you need to bring in this season.

Click through to read on
Penned by some dude in a hole.

After a wildly successful debut last season, the ORFFA Women’s Round is back. Most importantly, the round is marked by our two female coaches leading their improving teams into battle.

Wagga Wagga Wombats 1057 defeated Mount Beauty Uglies 716

The statisticians were heard muttering that if @bama was able to field a full team on the park, he would have knocked off the marsupials, with his Uglies averaging 71.6 per player to the Wombat’s 70.4. Ranga Oliver knocked up a 124 and Wildman Sicily smashed out a 145 for Wagga Wagga. What @Lenny120 would give for Sicily to be available more than every other week because of suspension. For the away team Jack Graham tallied 131 and the people’s beard knocked out a lazy 127, without a checkside or irate front row fan to be seen.

Whitsunday Warriors 1194 defeated Marble Bar Misfits 1141

The Warriors took care of the undermanned misfits in a fairly pedestrian affair, with Richard Douglas(132) and Kane Lambert(120) the only players giving a shit for the home side. Lachlan Fogarty battled on in the ruck for a scintillating 33, exactly half of the Misfit’s full time ruckman Ryder. Daniher will be out for a few weeks with the good old osteitis pubis, apparently unrelated to his highly heralded performance of the Nutbush in the Tiki Bar the night before.

Charlies Opening Spelunkers 1014 defeated by Iron Knob Codpieces 1195

If @ChiefRussell was concerned his mid season draft pick was going north, then I certainly tried to put that to rest with a meagre 1014. The fact that I jumped up a ladder spot based on season scoring differential will cause the offices of ChiefBet to go into meltdown. The Bont pulled out late when his zungwang blew a vessel, and the rest of the team were their normal average selves. The men with the protruding genital protection took care of business in the pit, with...