Amid a plethora of awkward blow outs, the author has found it refreshing to be remind y’all of not whom starred for your team but whom brought their “C” game and sealed their own fate. And yes, rolling with this brevity theme. Apologies if you waited up for this...
Whitsunday Warriors 1180 def Wineglass Bay Packers 1073
The Wineglass Bay scenic shuttle was well overbooked this weekend, as passengers were so plentiful, they outnumbered the healthy folk. Mr Hewett can be thanked for single-handedly getting the visitors into 4 digits.
Rubberneck Packers – McKenna, Collins, Scully, Matera, Reid, Lynch, Stretch
For the home side, only a minor stain in an otherwise mediocre performance.
Grubby Warriors – Gray, Wines, Tarrant (and probably JJK cos he’s still half of what he should be). Props to Jezza who’s having a career year.
Charlies Opening Spelunkers 980 def by Venus Bay Vultures 1206
The hosting Spudlunkers were even more putrid than normal as the Vultures pecked the cotton-pickin life out of them. Oh Bont was ok.
Cotton-picked Troggs – Bonner, Atkins, SPS, Florent, Higgins, Fritsch, Merrett, Williamson
The visiting Vultures were not immune to regurgitating all over their team mates, just well disguised by some return to form of Gaff, Yeo and Stef.
Yaked on Vultures – Howe, Walker, Fiorini, Beams, Hogan , Daniher
Bring on the MSD so both these teams can load up on more junk.
Mount Beauty Uglies 1002 def by Larrikin Lagoon Lefties 1025
Must be some sort of divine intervention that I get to pen the review for my solitary win for the season (nothing to do with the fact I swapped duties with Len a week ago).
To be honest, when a team a shite as the Lefties gets a win, its gonna be hard to sort the chaff from the chaff. But here goes.
Fistful of SFA Lefties – Brayshaw, Berry, Clark, Ruck dept, Coach
With a 3-3 win loss record heading into this game, the Uglies were staring at a probable victory, unfortunately their absentee list is also sporting a similar ratio.
Walking dead Uglies – Ellis, Tracca, Rioli, Gallucci, Butters, Donut
In the wash up, Gawn and Dumont made the scoreline respectable for both sides.
Waikikamoocow Incorrigibles 1475 def Gariwerd Cockatoos 1202
The Cows head back into the clouds this week as the unlucky Gariwerd streak continues.
5th vs 5th (ladder vs points) looked tight on paper but the visitors got heavily clipped.
Mislaid and misshapen Cockies – Wingard, Miller, Rocky, Houli, Hooker, Walker
Almost flawless performance from the Cow kickers with 8 tons and 3 90’s. Ouch!
Slightly under par Bovines – Crouch
Plenty of outstanding efforts to write about but the blue moon of Hibbo and the rise of ROB will have many a star gazer excited.
Birdsville Battlers 1078 def by Gundagai Grasshoppers 1356
Another training drill for the freight train of Gundagai. To be fair, the Battlers only rolled out half a defensive line and something inhuman up forward.
Stayed in bed Battlers – Battle, Hunter, McKay, Taylor, Knight, Backline
Solid team effort from the visitors but the holes are getting harder to putty over. The injury to Adams and Oliver’s form are concerning.
Fag behind the canteen at ¾ time Hoppers – Dawson, Adams, Billings
With the Uglies and Packers over the next fortnight, the Hoppers have the luxury of resting a few dozen guys and prepare for a mid-season assault.
Nareewillock Nuffers 943 def by Foul Bay Chickens 1400
Chooks could have won this with one wing tied behind their back. Which they arguably did with Danger pumping out his worst game in a decade (not sure if he’s been playing that long but it makes for good copy).
Less than dangerous Cluckers – Danger, Doogs, Big Boy
Slapped with the trifecta of injury, poor form and a star-studded opponent, the Nuffers were on a hinding to nothing by half time.
I’m dead, stop kicking me Nuffererers – Tucker, Dow, SPP, Ebert, Hill , Cun(n)inghams, Lester
Good news for the home side is that there’s only 4 months of footy left to endure.
Nowhere Else Wanderers 1003 def by Cradle Mountain Devils 1296
Once upon a time there was a mighty team called the Dirigibles. They scaled the lofty heights a few times but never quite made it. A bit like club stalwart Jack Newnes. Started as a nobody, became an average midfielder, had a brief stint as an elite defender, merged into an shite midfielder and then into a blossoming forward. This roller coaster of madness was too much for the inaugural coach to handle and after a couple of false farewells, jumped ship. Now why the stunning intro and flaky analogy you ask? Well stuffed if I know, think I lost what I was getting at a good three...years ago. A new coach has entered the fray and the roller coaster has a new coat of paint but a similar feel.
Somewhere else wanderers - Savage, Lewis, Cogs, Walters, Titch, WHE
An impressive start for the come of age Devils as Pendles turns back the clock and Marshall exceeds all expectations.
Not so rosy Deserters - Jones, Heppell, Gresham, Zaha
An easy victory for the visitors.
Marble Bar Misfits 1420 def Lovely Banks Lilacs 1245
Yaysus, 466 from a defensive line must be some sort of FA record!
The Bar certainly held up well amid a series of late outs. Props to Mundy.
Just popping out for a quickie Misfires - Smurph, Kelly, Hickey
No one like the term honourable loss, but it’s getting late in the review, so that’ll do. Nothin to sneeze at for the Haze with Hoff and Parish starring.
Excuse me while I kiss the sky Lavenders - Rampe, Heeney, Jones
Look out ladder leader.
Wagga Wagga Wombats 1127 def by Iron Knob Codpieces 1305
Two middle of the road teams, literally slapping it out on the median strip, waiting for one to revert to car crash.
Crash test Wombats - Sicily, Shiel, Swallow, Curnow, Lycett, Gibbs.
A mixed bag of glistening nuts for the visitors thanks to out of the box talents of Darling, Brow and Shuey.
Let me know when this is in the bag Knobs - Hodge, Stanley, Walla, Hendo.
A loose grip on the 8 for the inconsistent Cods.