ORFFA Round 16 - Teams, Banter et al

Discussion in 'ORFFA' started by Len, Jul 27, 2017.

  1. chris88

    chris88 1000 Monkeys at 1000 Typewriters Staff Member

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    A 1250+ I think because most of my guys turned up or played. Team coming good at the wrong end of the season.

    The Lilacs join the Blimps on six wins too by the looks.
     
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  2. anthak

    anthak Moderator Staff Member

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    @Bandit was wondering how to out tank the ultimate tanker this week and it looks like he almost got the job done, until commish @Len came along and sorted it out
     
    Last edited: Jul 30, 2017
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  3. That KI Guy

    That KI Guy Moderator Staff Member

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    What!
    I thought a joker round was an entitlement of the reigning premier?:D
     
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  4. chris88

    chris88 1000 Monkeys at 1000 Typewriters Staff Member

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    Oh no, I spoke too soon - the Lilacs didn't quite get there :( Well done Wombats, bad luck Lilacs ....
     
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  5. Bandit

    Bandit Moderator Staff Member

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    Still an issue with the teams page.... tried to clear my team and couldn't... I think I've broken the innernets @walesy
     
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  6. Len

    Len Cockburn Knightrider Staff Member

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    Should be right now mate, the lockout reset is a bit dodgy and I'd not yet fixed it
     
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  7. Bandit

    Bandit Moderator Staff Member

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    Thanks mate, working now
     
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  8. graeme

    graeme Well-Known Member

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    In an amazing display of precision jelly guy has managed to ensure that if you take any three of his team's results this year, they match his team's three letter identifier in TS. Absolutely outstanding work @walesy to predict this so long ago! :thumbsu::thumbsu::thumbsu:
     
    Last edited: Jul 31, 2017
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  9. Bandit

    Bandit Moderator Staff Member

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    Quality statistical analysis @graeme
     
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  10. Bandit

    Bandit Moderator Staff Member

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    Round 16 review:

    Larrikin Lagoon 908 defeated by Charlie’s Opening 1234
    If we were going to score my efforts to out-tank the tanker, I would rank about as high as Anthony Scaramucci’s chance of becoming the next POTUS. @That KI Guy clearly told the left footed lads to do as little as possible, without drawing the attention of the ORFFA Commission and risking possible draft sanctions moving forward. Seb Ross (132) and Taylor Duryea (99) must have missed the meeting, but everyone else ticked the box. No less than 6 tons thanks to the efforts of Savage (103), The Bont (123), Hill (103), Big Boy (113), Jake The Snorter (107) and Liam Duggan (107) lead the Spelunkers to a score that meant they had no option other than to take the four points. I’m perplexed how Mitch McGovern only gets 60 points with four goals including the game tieing goal in the dying seconds.

    Who get’s a high five? : The Lefties Ruck Line for not even showing up
    Who can get stuffed? : Champion Data for the McGovern score

    Venus Bay 1323 defeat Birdsville Battlers 1195
    @Fitzy 's mob put @JC to the sword for his fourth loss in 5 weeks. Kreuzer (worst trade I ever did) and Buddy had off days, but the boys at Pippie Beach still rumble on… with the only loss this year coming against the Spelunkers (I swear you guys are all out to stitch up my tanking efforts). Docherty, Howe, Pittard, Beams, Higgins all went large for the Vultures. Witherden (jet), McDonald, Ryan and Sheed did well for the Battlers… who lost Blakely early. Fitzy mumbled that he would give his left nut to win the premiership this year… unfortunately this was overhead by Jesse Hogan who will now be out for a few weeks in protest.

    Who gets a high five? : JC for drafting/trading in Witherden and Ryan… very shrewd.
    Who can get stuffed? : Fitzy for putting together a bloody good team


    Nunawading Nuffers 719 defeated by the Mount Beauty Uglies 1117
    The press release by @melbandy that the Nuffers Cheer Squad were now sponsored by Kripsy Kreme was met with raucous applause at Mitcham Oval, and donuts were everwhere, with no less than 5 in Andy’s team and only 3 scores over 65. @bama squared his win/loss at 8 piece on the back of Dusty doing what Dusty does, and with Roo and Priddis announcing their retirements at the end of the season, the game at the Lagoon this weekend will be full of sentimental moments.

    Who gets a high 5?: Daniel Wells for scoring 18% of the Nuffers total score on his own
    Who can get stuffed? : Max Gawn for taking the Nuffers fill in ruckman Dale Thomas to the cleaners… pick on someone your own size Max!

    Gundagai Grasshoppers 1172 defeated by the Waikikamoocow Incorrigibles 1453
    @graeme must be over the moon with the performance of his team lately…. They are going along nearly as good as the Molly Dooker Carnival of Love that accompanied my lamb shank ragu last night. The Hoppers retain 4th place, although there is some debate as to if that is a good thing or not. The mids might be the undoing of @snoz in the finals, and Cockatoo going down again with another hammy won’t help. 5 tons and 4 90+ scores from the kiwis will have a few of the other fancied teams a bit nervous.

    Who gets a high 5?: Sarah and Sparky Marquis from Mollydooker… everywhere you go the label is a winner
    Who can get stuffed? : Tom Papley for getting my Hodgey rubbed out this week for running into his fist

    Wineglass Bay Packers 1082 defeated by Cradle Mountain Devils 1283
    Go Pack Go! Go Pack Go! was heard from the verandah of the Freycinet Golf Club as Wineglass Bay took on fellow Tasmanian’s the Devils. Unfortunately there was more pack than go with Sloane taking the boots off and telling @Tracey to get stuffed at quarter time, jotting a massive 36 into the notebook on his way to the showers. Miles and Tom Lynch (not sure if it is TL1 or TL2) were the only two to ton up for the Pack with a special shout out to Jimmy Webster who was hauled off the 7th fairway to suit up after the late withdrawal of Marley Williams. ORFFA Marketing & Communications Director @dmandrews will be happy but not satisfied with the Devils win, with Roughead (127), Shiels (100), Heppell (104) and Hurley (118) doing their part, however the other Tom Lynch left a stain in the trousers, along with 5 others scoring sub 80’s… not the sort of scoring one would want to take into their finals series.

    Who gets a high 5? : Jimmy Webster… it’s hard to walk off the 7th when you are staring birdie in the face after nutting a drive down the fairway.. fair play lad
    Who can get stuffed? : Marley Williams… stop trying to be the next Dane Swan and just play bloody footy

    Lovely Banks Lilacs 1151 defeated by Wagga Wagga Wombats 1166
    I wanted @Jen to continue her recent good run of form here, and pick up her fourth win from five games. There were two reasons for this… the first it is great to see the Lilacs in the winners circle… the second it would have put Jen above me on the ladder! Unfortunately it was not to be and the lavender haze went down to @Lenny120 's mob in a close one. Clayton Oliver (170) won the match on his own… amazing what happens when you play footy kid instead of going down like you’ve been shot. Mitch Duncan the only ton for the Lilacs, and Shiel the only other ton for the Wombats. These two guys will be happy to put the cue in the rack next week and begin the list management process.

    Who gets a high 5?: Jen, for finally starting to get some results after having to sort out the train wreck of a team she inherited a few years back.
    Who can get stuffed?: Lenny, for screwing up my chance for pick 4 by bloody winning.

    Whitsunday Warriors 1142 defeated by the Gariwerd Cockatoos 1255
    The cockies take the chockies in a true 8 point game, which gives @anthak one games breathing space in 8th from the Warriors and the Uglies, and should be enough to see him into the finals. Five tons from Gariwerd and only three from @TerryinBangkok 's mob with his beloved Port contingent of Wines, Boak and Gray all average. I don’t expect the Cockies to scare too many in the finals, but stranger things have happened, such as Harry Taylor congratulating Jerka Jenkins on last week’s game with a piece of ham… weird cat.

    Who gets a high 5? : Johannisen for returning to his form from last year
    Who can get stuffed ?: Hugh Greenwood, for stinking it up when Ant needed him the most in the real version of the game!

    Foul Bay Chickens 1262 defeated by Marble Bar Misfits 1374
    ChiefBet said the Chooks weren’t done yet… I’m telling you they are so well done they look like the snags at 4pm on a Saturday at Bunnings. Danger didn’t have the stones to challenge the MRP for being a thug and Sam Mitchell has decided that there is a limit to how much cobalt you can inject and is calling it a day at seasons end. Libba is over being in the ruck and Atley isn’t producing what he threatened. On the other side of the coin… the Misfits are doing a pretty good job of fitting in with each other, posting the highest total for the round, even with Laird, Ward and Elliott well held. @Len can ice the boys this week as he has cemented 3rd place in, chooks limping to the line and looking like finishing 8th.

    Who gets a high 5?: @ChiefRussell , for putting up with my crap for the entire season
    Who can get stuffed?: Shaun Atley, you screwed me over for 4 years, and now you are doing the Chooks… get stuffed.


    Iron Knob Codpieces 1180 defeated by Darraweit Guim Dirigibles 1264
    Speaking of limping, what would @jimbowan do to have a fully fit Gazza? If I was Fitzy or graeme the trouser protectors would be the one team I would be steering clear of next week when selecting who to play. Jimbo desperately needs a ruck (dejavu anyone?) and Waite is his inconsistent best. However with Hodge back after a one week rest, Gazza back in, and Waite coming up against the Gibbo-less Hawks, they could just light it up.

    In this game, @chris88 's team put in a very consistent effort across the board, with Kieren Jack maybe the only one to not pull his weight. For IKC DeGoey and Waite had stinkers, but McCrae (100), Shuey (121), Gray (112), Sinclair (104) and Murdoch (110) were on fire. Too little too late for Chris’ guys, the Knob will be praying for God to come back to the team.

    Who gets a high 5?: the ORFFA FIXture committee, for their magnificent foresight in scheduling Iron knob vs Foul Bay for the final H&A round… licking my chops on that one
    Who can get stuffed?: Ruckman, all of them, what a bloody pain in the arse they are.
     
    Last edited: Aug 3, 2017
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  11. graeme

    graeme Well-Known Member

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    Sensational read @Bandit, if that's what you produce at short notice am looking forward to a real review. ;)

    All power to the crew at Molly Dooker - amazingly they do not seem to have a NZ distributor. For ORFFANs who have not tried the wines, they are firm favourites in Cow country when supplies come through.
     
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  12. Len

    Len Cockburn Knightrider Staff Member

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    Awesome work @Bandit :)

    1 week to the Misfit's first final series, living the dream :p
     
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  13. anthak

    anthak Moderator Staff Member

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    I traded HG out a few weeks ago in classic. I coulda done with his 100 a fortnight ago actually.
     
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  14. Bandit

    Bandit Moderator Staff Member

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    He can still get stuffed Ant!
     
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  15. anthak

    anthak Moderator Staff Member

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    Fair enough. Why not, hey!

    Love the writeup too
     
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  16. That KI Guy

    That KI Guy Moderator Staff Member

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  17. ChiefRussell

    ChiefRussell Well-Known Member

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    Get stuffed Bandit!

    I mean, good job. I keep putting your comments up in the locker room as motivation. Problem is that half the team doesn't turn up to read them.
     
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  18. TerryinBangkok

    TerryinBangkok Moderator Staff Member

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    Don't overdream laddie, highest score of the round not. :(
     
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  19. TerryinBangkok

    TerryinBangkok Moderator Staff Member

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    Give the man some chocolates - best write-up I have come across - ever. Should be on the front page.

    And I agree on the out-of-contract McGovern's score - he was robbed. CD did not exactly load Robbie Gray up either. Perhaps they are expecting both of them to repeat it all again this weekend, which would give me great joy.
     
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